Mustering Courage
by thisoldporcelaincoffeeshop
Summary: Kurt Hummel was absolutely head over heels in love with Blaine Anderson. And that's all he could think about, in school, working at his dads tire shop, making dinner, anywhere. But when Kurt simply wants to tell Blaine how he feels, all of his plans come crumbling down when Blaine slips a hand under his shirt. The emotions come flooding. Warning: Mentions of severe bullying.
1. Alias

**Author's Note: Hiii! I haven't written in a while, and this idea just popped into my head as I did biology homework. It was odd, but I went with it. **

**Warnings: Mentions of bullying, some light making out, and yeah...**

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own Gleeeeeeeeeeeeee. **

****NOTE THIS ONE-SHOT TAKES PLACE A LITTLE AFTER PROM, SEASON 2.**

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Kurt Hummel was absolutely head over heels in love with Blaine Anderson. And that's all he could think about, in school, working at his dads tire shop, making dinner, _anywhere_. He would never dream of telling Blaine that, in fear that the feelings aren't replicated considering the fact they have never even said their first 'I love you's'. Kurt often thinks of initiating it, even though they've only really been dating for a month and a half. There was the time Blaine sat through a whole season of Project Runway just to please Kurt, the time Blaine was almost in tears after going into the petting zoo and facing head on head with a ferocious goat who wanted his feed (Kurt thought it was _adorable_), the time they spooned for the first time and Blaine insisted they have a talk about it because he knew Kurt was hesitant, and now. Right now, he would say it if it weren't for the fact that the latter's lips wear stifling any semi-coherent sentences Kurt even dared to make.

"Kurt, I-" Blaine began to say, rubbing circles near the hem of Kurt's shirt, only a mere thin layer of cotton preventing Blaine from touching more, and he just couldn't have that. Blaine fiddled with untucking Kurt's shirt from his jeans and gasped as Kurt began kissing up his jawline. And yes, Kurt would have taken this opportunity to mutter those three simple words if it weren't for the fact That Blaine's hand had now slipped under Kurt's shirt, and Kurt froze, all he was able to do was push Blaine lightly away.

"I-I'm sorry, Kurt. Was that too much?" Blaine said breathlessly, concern knitting within his words.  
And Kurt couldn't believe how noble Blaine could be in this situation, Kurt had had just rejected him. Pushed him away from breaking down another barrier in their relationship, even after having a talk about light make-out sessions, standing up of course. Kurt began to sob woefully, collapsing in a heap on the floor and curling around himself.

"K-Kurt, I am so sorry." Blaine responded, following his boyfriend by kneeling to the floor and reaching out to give a comforting touch, but being rejected yet again. "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable Kurt, I lo-, I really care about you, you know that. I wouldn't ever want to hurt you. I'm so sorry, Kurt, and I hope you know I would never ever judge you."

This simply made Kurt sob even more, his boyfriend was still so genuinely concerned even after yet another rejection, and the fact that Blaine had stifled his almost I love you.

"I'm sorry, Kurt." Blaine began to chant over and over again, his words becoming more choked up each time by guilt and tears.

"It's not your fault, Blaine. It's mine. I'm just so afraid, Blaine. I'm so afraid of chasing you away..."

"Kurt, you could never chase me away. Ever. You hear?" Blaine said sternly, tugging at Kurt's arms in attempt to unravel his boyfriend. Kurt hesitantly uncurled and looked up at Blaine, whose eyes were red and puffy from welled tears.

"But you, you are just so perfect and I'm just not. You can comfortably talk about...sex and not squirm. I envy it, Blaine. I envy your openness. I wish I could be able to flaunt around my body to you..." Kurt blushed. "But I'm afraid of what you'll think."

"Kurt, to tell you the truth, I have no idea what I am doing here. You just make me lose all my worries, you make me relax and I just rely on impulse when we are doing...stuff. And, Kurt i am not so confident about my body as one may think."

Kurt snorted. "Yeah right, you're gorgeous."

"And so are you, Kurt Hummel. The most gorgeous, beautiful...sexy being I have ever seen. And I just got carried away, I understand if you don't forgive me. But is there any way I can make it up to you?"

"Takeyourshirtoff." Kurt said in one breathe, in which Blaine responded with a quirk of an eyebrow and a puzzled expression. "Take your shirt off for me, Blaine, please."

"Kurt…I'm not exactly comfortable with that." Blaine squirmed under Kurt's lingering gaze on his chest.

"I will do it, only if you do. Please." Kurt began to beg.

"I-okay." Blaine decided hastily, pulling off his shirt and staring meticulously at the wall, like it was the most interesting thing in the world, whereas Kurt was staring, wide-eyed at Blaine's perfectly toned, muscular, devastating sexy, slightly hairy chest. After gawking for about two minutes, Blaine finally cleared his throat and spoke up. "Kurt, I'd feel much more comfortable if you would take your shirt off, too."

And then it hit Kurt. _He_ would have to take his shirt off, too. _He_ would have to expose himself to Blaine in a way he never thought he would ever have the chance of doing for someone. This caused panic to wash over Kurt. There, his beautiful boyfriend with the beautiful stomach sat expecting to see Kurt whip out a pair of abs, and Kurt couldn't handle that pressure. Especially because he knew what was hidden beneath.

"Shh, don't cry." Blaine began to comfort, stroking a thumb over Kurt's cheek, wiping away a few stray tears. "I won't ever judge you, Kurt. Ever."

"But, _Blaine. _You don't get it. You don't know what-you don't know what it looks like. It's awful." Kurt said in between sniffles, dropping his head in his hands, his shoulders shaking slightly.

"Kurt, what is 'it'? Is it you stomach, because Kurt, I _know _it's not. I didn't want to ever tell you this but when you wear you white v-neck and you dance or flex or _whatever_ I can see the outline of you toned muscles and _gosh, _Kurt…" Blaine began to trail off; he could feel his pant's tightening. His thoughts were derailed when he turned back to Kurt who had his shirt strewn somewhere in the room, his pale, porcelain chest exposed. And _gosh_, it was even more amazing than Blaine had pictured it. Blaine slowly trailed his eyes down Kurt's chest down to his stomach, and then, _oh. _He saw 'it'. 'It' broke his heart.

"Kurt, what happened?" Blaine said softly, his voice nearly a whisper and his eyes glazed over.

"In middle school…I had, I had this friend, David. We would do everything together, that is up until I turned eight and I found myself. Our mutual interests slowly diminished. And when high school rolled around, he targeted me. Bullied the life out of me every day. I was left with only one friend, Lucy**. She was nice, a sweet girl, but she was also a number one target for bullies and later would end up hating me anyways. Then, one day in the seventh grade, Lucy transferred. Dropped off the face of the earth. I was all alone in Bellville Middle School. I mean, we weren't the best of friends or anything for that matter but we kept each other company. Anyways, when Spring rolled around, I decided I'd try out for a sport. Baseball. Long story short, I was walking home one night from the batting cages and…and they beat the shit out of me, and gashed my stomach with their cleat. I transferred after that. And oh my gosh, you hate me now don't you? It's the ugliest thing ever and you're never going to want to even look at me anymore all because of this-" Kurt was instantly cut off by Blaine crashing their lips together. Kurt gasped immediately, and Blaine took this opportunity to slip his tongue into Kurt's mouth, tracing his bottom lip. Blaine then removed his right hand that was previously cupping Kurt's face and traced the prominent, milky white scar right above Kurt's bellybutton. Blaine pulled back, both boy's flushed and breathless.

Before Kurt could react by pushing Blaine's hand away from where it was slowly caressing the mark he felt oh-so-insecure about, Blaine grabbed his wrist and did the only sensible thing he could thing of at the moment to show Kurt just how beautiful he was to Blaine and hoped he wasn't overstepping. He placed Kurt's smooth, finely manicured hand over the bulge in his pants.

"See, Kurt. This is how much you turn me on. This scar, this scar isn't ugly. It's a part of you, a part of your gorgeous self that just makes you even more perfect. Yes, the scar may have an ugly story but it itself isn't ugly at all." Blaine stared up at Kurt with loving, bedroom eyes.

"I-" Kurt began to say, realizing he could not make a single coherent sentence, or nearly a syllable with his hand on Blaine's crotch. He quickly pulled away, his blush growing to a deep crimson red.

"And since you mustered up the courage to tell me the story of your scar and show it to me, I want to share with you one of my own." Blaine huffed, unclasping his and Kurt's hands, pivoting around so his back was facing Kurt. Blaine heard an audible gasp, and felt the warm, loving touches of Kurt grooming over the large scar across his back, relieving any tension in Blaine's body. Kurt waited silently for Blaine to begin his story, still slowly tracing the scar on his boyfriend's back that ran diagonal across his back. It was deep, puffy but seemed to have faded over time.

"It was about three years ago, my eighth grade year of middle school. I attended Fairbrook Middle School. It was a quaint, posh little school filled with ardently active Christians. Kurt, this is the story of what really happened at the Sadie Hawkins dance. I know we brushed over it a couple of times, but I-I want you to know it all." Blaine tensed up. "As I told you, I had just come out. I had been disowned by the whole community, banned from the local church, and my parent's absolutely despised me. They thought I was being selfish by ruining their reputation, and insisted on sending me to a straight camp over the summer. They, they even started some phony charity at the church to reenter themselves in the community, supposedly raising money to 'cure' me, and other's like me." Blaine chuckled bitterly, gritting his teeth slightly and clenching his fists. "Anyways, I was bullied. On a daily basis, swirlies, wedgies, dumpster tosses, shoves, anything harsh or violent, they did it. I brushed it off, who was there for me to confide in anyways? My brother, Cooper, was away at college and he was the only one who seemed to have accepted me. So, back to the dance. It was the second semester Sadie Hawkins dance and my parent's had convinced me to go there and meet some 'pretty young ladies'. I had asked the only other gay guy in my school, Adam. He shrugged and said "my brother'll pick us up at 10 after the dance, see ya' there". We went through the whole dance unharmed, even though I thought I was going to do from awkwardity. So, as we were waiting outside for his brother to pick us up, a couple of guys came over with pocket knives in their hand. It was dark, and they sauntered up to us oh-so-smugly, we were to afraid to breathe let alone run. After beating us senseless for a while with their fists, one of the boys screamed out "Stab him, just stab the fag, he's still moving." I suddenly felt the prick of a knife tear through my suit and the flesh on my back as blood pooled all around me. I heard a car pull in, I presumed it was Adam's brother considering the boy's were cussing and I could faintly see them running away through my blurry vision. And that's the last thing I remember about eighth grade in Fairbook, I was in a coma under intensive care for the rest of the year, and was forced to repeat at Dalton Academy's Pre-High School Preparatory Middle School." Blaine finished, staring blankly into space. He could feel Kurt wrap his arms around Blaine's waist, stretch his long, denim-covered legs around Blaine and Kurt's soft hands pulling him back to lean against Kurt's stomach. "But hey, at least I didn't have to go to that straight camp."

Kurt responded by simply leaning in and giving Blaine a deep, tender kiss, their tears mingling.

"I love you." Kurt muttered against Blaine's lips.

"I love you, too, Kurt. I love you too."

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**Author's Note: I hope you enjoyed! It kinda made me cry writing this because it was sad ):**

****Lucy...hmm wonder who that is? Any guesses? Whoever wins gets a virtual Klaineicorn. **

**Reviews, criticisms, comments, suggestions, always welcome...**


	2. Dollar Massages

Kurt sauntered down the hallway with his usual I'm-better-than-you-all persona, a slight sway of the hips. He knew if he were to keep up with this slow pace, he would be late for trigonometry. But he looked fucking fabulous, and he didn't _care. _He slowly approached a group of huddled teens, 'ooh-ing', 'ahh-ing' and giggling harshly about something. Kurt presumed it was a graffiti-ed prom campaign poster, as Quinn, Santana, and Lauren were _very_ feisty about winning. But as Kurt side eyed towards the bulletin board and caught a glimpse between shoulders, his heart plummeted though the floor. _Was that- Was that Lucy?_

Then, he heard a fast, angry click of clunky heels scattering across the sticky linoleum tiles of McKinley High. _Quinn._ She looked pain-stricken and _ashamed. _And within the next few seconds, the poster of Kurt's dear old friend Lucy was crumbled on the floor by Quinn, who ran off the same way she came, in tears.

And then it all clicked in place for Kurt. The beautiful gardenia colored eyes, the beautiful cheek bones, the absolute _desire_ to be thought of as beautiful that was coating Lucy was held within Quinn. It all made sense. The sudden weight loss, joining every possible sport activity, the transfer. The reminiscent, heartbreaking stares Kurt would occasionally get from Quinn. Now this. _Quinn is Lucy. Lucy Caboosey is Quinn Fabray, head cheerleader and future prom queen. _He quickly bolted after her, following her into the empty choir room she had enclosed herself in, cuddled in the back corner of the classroom, sobbing.

"Quinn?" Kurt said softly, quietly clicking the door closed behind him.

"G-go away, whoever you are. I don't want you to see me like this." Quinn said bitterly, her voice being muffled however by tears.

"Quinn, it's me, Kurt." Kurt said, gaining enough courage to take a few steps closer to the mess of a girl before him.

"Kurt? What- what the hell are you doing here, we never even-"

"Quinn, I remember. And I know you do, too." Kurt quipped, which caused Quinn to look up at him from where she was sitting, her pale complexion now blotchy and tear stained. She looked so vulnerable Kurt could have sworn she was her old self again, Lucy.

"So what? You think coming in here and telling me you remember me being the awful little thing I was is going to help any?" Quinn yelled, gritting her teeth. "It's bad enough that some other kids are going to recognize me, and I'd rather not know."

"Quinn, I doubt there are many students here who even went Bellville, that's a couple of towns over. That town is too posh, not many people would dare to leave."

"You did." Quinn said quickly.

"Quinn, I had too. Don't you remember? We were on the same boat. Bullied daily. The difference from me and you is you had the easy way out, you left before it got really bad. I was bullied out of that school, Quinn." Kurt said softly, pulling up a chair next to a hesitant Quinn.

"I-I'm sorry I left you, Kurt. I know we weren't the best of friends or anything like that, but I felt you kind of gave my life purpose then. I helped you, and you helped me." Quinn said, bursting into more tears.

"Its okay, Quinn. You got out, and it clearly helped. Look at you, you are _gorgeous_. Stunning, actually. And you are going to be prom queen soon, and you were the head cheerleader of the Cheerios. You've grown so much Quinn, you aren't Lucy anymore. So why are you so upset over this?"

"Because I'm not Lucy anymore, Kurt. That's why." Quinn said a little too loudly.

"What? Now you're confusing me, Quinn."

"Lucy was so nice, so caring, and so genuine. Now look at me, Kurt. I'm an absolute _bitch_, who had a baby at age sixteen. What the hell would Lucy think of that? Head cheerleader? Lucy would laugh. Prom queen? Only in my dreams. Kurt, I'm someone whom I've always hated. I have become the girl who would bully a girl like Lucy. The only thing I care about is myself, makeup and beauty. That's not what I want, Kurt. It's not what I want." Quinn sobbed, chanting the last line over and over.

"Lucy Quinn Fabray, you listen to me right now." Kurt roared, grabbing Quinn's wrist after listening to her cry for a comfortable amount of time. "You still are, Lucy, Quinn. In here." Kurt said, practically cringing at the corny line, and holding Quinn's wrist up to her heart. "I doubt you will ever be Lucy on the outside again, or even fully personality-wise. But you still are her, deep inside of you. You just have to channel her; maybe try being a little kinder and caring less about superficial things like boys, makeup and clothes. Change isn't impossible, Quinn, and you of all people know that. So don't you tell me that you can't." Kurt said, with a watery smile plastered across his face, he couldn't help but tear up. Quinn then mirrored her expression, and pulled Kurt in for a deep embrace.

"Thank you, Kurt. Thank you so much." Quinn muttered.

"Hmm, Kurt, would you mind-" Blaine began to say, his nose snuggled into Kurt's hair, his beautiful boyfriend curled up against his chest. He daringly slipped his hand under Kurt's shirt and began tracing the scar there.

"I-"

"You don't have to tell me anymore about your experiences in middle school, I just, I want to know as much about you as I can, Kurt." Blaine said, his words filled with sincerity and sympathy.

"Blaine, I already told you the story, I don't know what else to tell you…" Kurt trailed off, squirming away from his boyfriend.

"Kurt, I could tell you were holding back. I know there was more, and- I just, I want to know. I can't explain it." Blaine said sorrowfully, propping himself up on his elbows to stare at his boyfriend who had now scrambled out of the bed. And that was the last thing he wanted.

"Then…then, Blaine, you have to tell me more about you. Your days before Dalton." Kurt retorted, staring back at his boyfriend who was sprawled across his bed. He just wanted to snuggle, whisper sweet nothings into each other's ears, and hopefully forget what the memories talking to Quinn brought up. But then Blaine did this. He didn't want to be angry, but he couldn't help himself.

"What, why?"

"I want to know about you, too, Blaine." Kurt said, softening.

"…Oh-okay." Blaine said hesitantly, motioning for Kurt to return to the bed. "Just, can you go first? I'm, I'm a little nervous, Kurt."

"Blaine Anderson, nervous? How unheard of." Kurt snorted. Blaine felt a pang of remorse for even bringing this up, and was questioning Kurt's bitterness. _Maybe I shouldn't of brought this up. But hey, everyone handles difficult memories differently. _However, as soon as Kurt noticed the regretful look in his eyes, he quickly scrambled to cuddle with Blaine. "I'm sorry, Blaine. I didn't mean it like that, it's just, it's hard, Blaine. It's hard for both of us, and I know this conversation was going to happen eventually, but I didn't expect it to happen now. I thought I had time to, erm, prepare for this."

"Prepare?" Blaine questioned.

"Yeah, I don't know. I just, come to terms with it all. I don't think I have. And I've tried so hard to make sense of everything. You know, Blaine. I talked to that girl, Lucy, the one from my middle school yesterday."

"Really? Kurt, that's great." Blaine said hopefully.

"It turns out Lucy is Quinn Fabray, head cheerleader, future prom queen, girlfriend of Finn, my brother and head quarterback. She has been in Glee since last year, and we have been in high school together since freshman year and she hadn't muttered a word about it." Kurt said, drawing circles on Blaine's stomach below where his head was resting on Blaine's chest.

"Oh my god, wow. How did you find out?" Blaine breathed heavily, carding a hand though Kurt's hair.

"Another prom queen candidate, Lauren, decided to play dirty and dig up some dirt on Quinn. She did some research, found out Quinn was just an alias, printed out a bunch of pictures of the old Quinn and plastered them all around the school. I saw Quinn rip one of them down, in tears, and it just clicked."

"Wow." Blaine said simply, all the response he could rack his brain for. That was a heavy load, and he wasn't sure how he himself would handle it, let alone how Kurt did.

"I think that helped me come to terms with some things, I guess. I mean, it explains why she just vanished, left me by myself. Blaine, I-I think I'm ready to tell you." Kurt said, stuttering.

"Kurt, are you sure? You don't have to; I shouldn't have rushed you into this. I should have eased our way into talking about this. I just, I don't know what' wrong with me lately. I've been acting only on instinct, and god, Kurt, you just make me lose myself, I just unravel around you, and-" Blaine began rambling, being cut off by Kurt placing a tender kiss on Blaine's lips.

**Author's Note: So here it is, a second installment! I wasn't planning on making this multi-chaptered, but I think there will be a couple more. I like where this story is going**. **I hope you do, too.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee**

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"I love you, Blaine, and I'm ready. But the question is, are you?" Kurt broke the kiss apart, still staying within kissing distance of Blaine.

"I-I think I am, Kurt. I love you, too, and I want us to share everything with each other. Just, yeah, you're right, it's hard remembering something you've worked your way into putting in the past. I guess, I think I need time to 'prepare' too, Kurt. If that's okay." Blaine mumbled, avoiding eye contact with Kurt, becoming slightly embarrassed.

"Hey, Blaine. It is most definitely okay. So don't be ashamed, it's okay to be afraid, honey." Kurt said sweetly, cupping his hand under Blaine's chin and pressing another kiss to his lips.

"And anyways, I have to meet up with my dance crew. I'm putting on a flash mob to Duck Sauce's 'Barbra Streistand' for Rachel today." Kurt smiled, lightening the mood.

"How did I not know about this? I would have loved to join in!" Blaine chuckled.

"Because I was hoping you would record it, YouTubers love a good flash mob. And after we can go shopping. I hear Gap's having a sale on socks." Kurt winked.

"Hey! I am never going into that store again…" Blaine pouted, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Alright, alright. I just love making you squirm." Kurt snickered, bopping Blaine on the nose. "We can get dollar massages instead whilst eating strawberry ice cream."

"Sounds like a plan."

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**AN: So yes, it was kind of all over the place. But I have this theory that Kurt and Blaine get those dollar massages a lot and chuckle because they are like an old married couple and they think it's adorable.**

**Hope you enjoyed (: the next chapter will have lots of angst ): So I wanted to make this chapter sort of sweet. **


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